bigsister@motherschoice.org
January 17, 2008
Should an adoptee child be told about his/her adoption status?

Coming soon…

Posted by admin at 06:30 PM.
Adoption - 14 Comments
Comments:

Definitely. We adopted a boy 19 years ago from Mother’s Choice and he was told about his adoption from an early age which he accepts and has no problem about it.

feraya | May 05, 2008, 08:57pm
Comments:

一定要比孩子知道,父母可以等他到18時說給他聽

tell | July 05, 2008, 11:35am
Comments:

I agree that the child shall know the fact that he/she is being adopted.

When will be the best time? How do we disclosed the infoamtion? How do we manage it if he/she discovered hints well before he/she is 18 years old? What are the benfits behind that we disclosed the information?

hkdiver | July 11, 2008, 10:33am
Comments:

本人認為不要讓孩子知道,若你把他視作己出,就讓他以為你們是他的生父母.如告訴他後,他可能會去想親生父母,或變得自卑等.

Gloria&Glory | September 19, 2008, 06:51pm
Comments:

無論她的親生父母是怎樣的人,遺棄他是環境迫成??還是什麼??他都有權利要知道,更何況他會識分辨是非黑白.....應該不會變得自卑等

tell | October 19, 2008, 02:14am
Comments:

一定要比他知,可能他母親到是逼於無內先不要他,可能他到好想見返他

yoyo2008 | November 07, 2008, 12:52am
Comments:

Naturally, they should know, and the earlier the better.  An average person will be able to pick up things about difference in physical appearance, the relatives’ ‘strange looks’, etc.  What is more, a child adopted in Hong Kong does not even have a ‘birth’ certificate, but is given only an adoption certificate.  Anybody who needs to show his ‘birth’ certificate will immediately know that he is adopted, whether his parents wish to tell him or not.  What is more, adoption is not a shameful thing.  It is just one option (under somewhat awkward situations) for the birth parents, adoptive parents and child to look for the best way to serve the 3 parties, hoping to bring comfort and joy to each party.  Since then it is not a shameful thing, the child must of necessity know this to be so, and to believe that God has different plans, loving plans, for him, which may differ from many others.

hot_fan | November 10, 2008, 01:52pm
Comments:

作為領養社工,我們會認為越早跟孩子提及領養就越好,要知道當大家都認為領養不是一件不見得光的事,相反它只是其中一個建立家庭的方法(我們希望社會人士都明白這個道理),那我們為什麼不可讓孩子或他人知道呢?我同意上述一些意見,孩子是有權知道他的領養身份,在適切的年齡,更要逐步讓他知道自己的故事,這是屬於孩子的。孩子的生命是在母胎便開始,並不是到了領養家庭後的事,不要以為孩子在領養時只是數星期或數個月大的BB,就什麼都不知道,千萬不要低估他們的能力。

不但不要隱瞞,還要在孩子年紀小的時候開始告知,讓家長自己及孩子都習慣講及領養的事情(家長也需要練習呢 ... 就如談論性教育一樣,趁早開始說),不要等到18歲,誰能擔保孩子在18歲前沒有其他人把領養事實透露出來,若這個人不是父母,而是其他人,試想想領養父母跟孩子多年來建立的信任關係將變成如何?

無可否認,領養對孩子、領養父母、生父母都帶來不同程度的傷痛,但有誰一生中不經歷傷痛遺憾呢?我們要幫助下一代接受自己的全部,學習在傷痛遺憾中成長,珍惜及尊重自己及身邊的人和事。

共勉之!

grin

領養社工Social Worker | December 10, 2008, 04:05pm
Comments:

I was adopted from Mothers Choice 15 years ago and have been told about it since a young age. I think it is fine because I don’t feel that different.

KellyJordan | December 25, 2008, 03:59am
Comments:

Thank you for your comment, Kelly.  May I know a little more about you ... as you said you were adopted from Mother’s Choice, we would like to get your information so that we can update our database.  Also, voices like yours are not often heard in our society, so if there is a chance, we would love to hear more about your story and experience as being an adopted person.

Hope you will see this message and look forward to your email to us at

Mother’s Choice Adoption Social Worker

領養社工Social Worker | January 02, 2009, 04:40pm
Comments:

我會係佢細蚊仔果陣就講佢知佢既身世~
同時會當係自己親生一樣~
希望佢會明白就算唔係親生父母都
仲有好多人係愛佢,關心佢~

就算佢要返佢親生父/母身邊,
都係長大成人既時候~
責任可算完成了。

好心的人付出,,係不求回報~
領養可以幫到人, 幫到社會嘛~

karman | April 17, 2009, 10:55pm
Comments:

我都係一個被領養的年青人
我唔知我生父母係邊個,係點既樣
我dad同mum係我7,8歲就講左比我聽
初初我接受唔到,後來我覺得生父母一定係有困難先會唔要我
所以我講越細個講就越好 越大個講,佢會越難接受

家嘉[vampire] | August 18, 2009, 03:44pm
Comments:

身為一個曾生下孩子給人領養ga母親~~~我當場希望自己的孩子會知道自己的親生父母係點樣~~因為到而家我都仲好希望他朝有一日佢會想見下我~~~

Emily1207 | October 26, 2009, 01:59am
Comments:

致Emily1207:

作為一個女兒的媽媽,明白你失去小孩的感受、無奈及痛苦的掙扎。希望你能衝出黑暗,好好生活,他日與孩子相見。
祝生活愉快!

sum-yau | November 20, 2009, 03:52pm
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